Well, June 10th was the last chemo. It went well enough. This time the docs gave me meds for the intense pain of the neuropathy in my foot and the muscles. But the meds they give you are steroid loaded. So, again for the next four days I had very little sleep, but the pain was less severe.
I was to take the meds for a week but about the 6th day, I just said I have to get off of this stuff as I was unable to sleep. I had started to taper off the 4th day to one a day but still little sleep came. Plus the pain pills they give when you taper off on the steroids made me miserable. My stomach was upset, I needed laxatives so that the pain in my gut would go away. So, I got through the first week.
Last night I had a decent night's sleep for the first time in a long while and today I was well enough to write a few words here. I wish I could tell you all was well and that I am not having any problems with this treatment but I am really struggling through it. Your prayers are essential on the nights when sleep will not come and I feel so alone. I know millions in the world go through the same thing. Many with worse outcomes than mine but when you are going through it in the middle of a long night it is so hard so very difficult.
But today with sleep and the sun shinning and the cool breezes blowing here this morning all is right with the world. I am still a bit weak as my red cell counts remain low but at least I feel almost human again. I only have a few weeks left til Cathi and the girls come. They will buoy my spirits and make things a bit more tolerable. Thanks again for cards and other gifts that come periodically. Do not forget me. Keep the prayers coming. Have a good summer day.
2 comments:
You are not forgotten, Pat!!
Those awful dark hours in the night when sleep won't come are some of the loneliest that exist. Try to think of us all - all around the globe - thinking of you and cheering you on.
Dear Pat, I'd totally forgotten the "steroids stop you from sleeping" thing. I lay awake with my eyes shut and my brain buzzing after every dose. But they are supposed to help the chemo to work, so we just have to put up with them; and, as you see, 3 years later you'll have forgotten all about it! LOL ...
The Taxol gave me peripheral neuropathy too. My legs hurt dreadfully after every dose of that stuff. And I lost some feeling in my fingertips, and a lot of feeling from my toes, which still haven't come back, but that's a small price to pay for still being alive, with daughters who can come and visit!
Do just relax, look after yourself, rest as much as you can, and you will gradually get back to feeling normal, I promise. If I can do it, then so can you.
Hugs from Margery in the UK.
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